Tuesday, February 5, 2013

when hope dawns :: a mother’s conversation with her daughter

[Dad & Marie, Fall Retreat, etc 273[4].jpg]

Last night, as I was about to sing to my daughter before bed, she said “Did Mommy’s mommy go up into Heaven?” At first I thought she was talking about Jesus going up into Heaven as that is what my husband was reading to her from the Jesus Bible Storybook before bed.  Then she made sure I understood it was ‘Mommy’s mommy’ that she was talking about. 

And I said, “Yes, honey, that’s right.  Mommy’s mommy did go up into heaven.  And do you know what her name was?” Inquisitive, expectant eyes met my own in the night light glow.  “Her name was Susie, just like you.  You are named for her.”  We have already talked about this, but I look forward to it meaning more as time goes on.  Joy lit her face and she said “She and I have the same name?” and I said “yes, honey, that’s right and if she were here you would see that she absolutely adores you like your Mimi {daddy’s mommy} does.”

And I had the thought.  The one that has determinedly inserted itself into my ponderings of life and death, earth and heaven, here-and-now and eternity.  There is that hope, that belief in the grace and goodness of God, that though my mom has gone up to heaven, she can see me, my kids, our lives.  Somehow.  Some way.

The best evidence that I have of this from the Bible is that beloved reminder that our race here, the journey Home, is cheered on by a ‘great cloud of witnesses’ who have gone before.  And I have nestled that deep within my heart and allowed my imagination to give birth to a creative hope.

I know that time is not a commodity of Heaven or of God.  Time as we know it in this life has no meaning when we cross into eternity and somehow all that is good and beautiful of this life becomes forever a part of Heaven.  Therefore those who are ‘absent from the body and present with the Lord’ experience that timeless place of all good things.

So when I think of my dear mama somehow seeing me in these stages of life which have included, courtship, nearly 10 years of marriage, the birth of three children and the sojourn to another land it is the dawn of hope. 

It is the hope that death is not the end but the very true beginning of something new, deeper and infinitely better. 

It is the hope that all that makes eternity possible for the believer, namely the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ—the embodiment of the heart of God—is truest of true. 

It is the hope that no good thing is ever truly lost only flown away to an eternally secure place in the hands, heart and home of God.

And it is this hope that guides me closer to the God who has given me the firstfruits of His Spirit that causes me to groan inwardly as I wait eagerly for that full redemption of this body.  It is the dearest thing that I still share with my beloved mama—that though she has gone before, we will experience together the culmination of all things, the return of Our Savior, the last vanquishing of Satan and death, and ALL OF CREATION being set free.  It is a hope that cannot be seen with human eyes, for that is not truly hope.  And since it cannot be seen with human eyes we await it with patience…a gleam in our eyes that hints to a blessed and perfect secret.

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